Category: Stuff
Welcome, my tiny meat blobs.
Boston Dynamics Releases Asimov Decision API
These days a well-known provider of fodder for apocalyptic robotic uprising scenarios, Boston Dynamics first made waves across the Internet …
Dear Tabby – My Husband’s an Alcoholic
DEAR TABBY: My husband has been a prolific drinker his whole life–I knew this when we were married years ago, …
Firefighters Arrive in Time to Offer Thoughts & Prayers to People Trapped in Burning House
“The family kept telling things like ‘help!’ and ‘use that ladder you’re holding!'” says local Fire Chief. “And I yelled back ‘THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS!!’ I even tweeted it.”
Last-Minute Low-Investment Halloween Ideas
We at The Grumpy Universe acknowledge that the benefits of “growing up” are poorly researched and largely anecdotal. But it should at …
Derpwatching for Beginners
Never been derpwatching before? This beginner’s guide will give you all the information you need to get started on a successful, satisfying derpwatching career.
TGU Exclusive: Interview with Zinoxan President Jarbandidax
Few sentient masses have had as galactic an influence as President Jarbandidax of the planet Znoxqueg. Elected Imperator Grossus for seven …
The Grumpy Universe Creates Nihi List Dating Service
A new era dawns, meatbags. We fleshly coils here on planet Earth generally have an inborn need for emotional and …
Chinese Knock Off Trump Resort, Building “Fart Casino and Hotel”
At a time when the leader of the tree world is already escalating tensions with China over North Korea’s nuclear aspirations, …